I encountered the Father’s love
“In my first Fatherheart school I heard God ask me: ‘Whose son are you?’ The question surprised me. This was the beginning of the journey of my heart towards sonship. When I received the heart of a son towards my own father, also God became a Father to me.”
Ever since my youth, I felt in my heart that there is something greater and something more real than I had experienced as a Christian. I was listening to James Jordan’s teaching about the love of the Father. During the teaching, I felt God’s love rush over me in a way I couldn’t even imagine possible. I felt like I was in a place I had always been looking for. I said to God, Help me never leave this place. I am ready to leave everything to get this. Your love is all I need. I heard God say, In this place I have always called you to be so that you might experience my love. Follow this stream! Encountering this love was so intense and life-changing that it opened my heart to receiving more of the Father’s love.
A year later I was in my first Fatherheart school. There was teaching about Jesus as God’s Son, but also about him being a son to his own parents. Therefore, we should also have a heart of a son to our own parents. I thought I didn’t need to process these things because I had a pretty nice relationship with my parents. After all, I was a pastor’s son, already a grown man and even a pastor myself, so there was no reason to return to childhood matters. However, I allowed the Holy Spirit to show the true state of my heart in relation to my parents.
The Holy Spirit showed me many bad things I had done to my parents and many things I had failed to do. On top of all that, I had closed my heart from them, and I understood that they couldn’t be for me the source of blessing I would have needed. As I thought about these things, I realized I wasn’t a son in my heart to my father or my mother.
The speaker continued his teaching and said that one time God asked him, Whose son are you? Then I heard God ask me the same question, Whose son are you? It became very personal. I had to deal with the issue face to face. I realized that this would be an obstacle that would also prevent me to have a heart of a son to God the Father. I realized I couldn’t do anything about this myself. I asked God to help me, and he really came to me. I began to see my father’s life with completely different eyes. All the accusation was taken away and I felt a deep compassion for my father. I realized he had given me everything he had. I felt a miracle happen; God really turned my heart towards my own father.
This was followed by a great time with my father. I said to him, You are my father and I am your son! We cried and rejoiced in a way we had never experienced before. My mother started spinning around in a circle and kept saying, Where did all this love come from, where did all this love come from… I can never forget how the room was filled with the immense love of the Father. From that moment on, my life has changed greatly. I also began to see my wife and children differently, my heart turned towards them as well. And most wonderfully, I felt in my heart that I am now a son also to the heavenly Father and he is a Father to me. I can live in a close relationship with him, just as Jesus described his own relationship with his Father. I am very happy that I had the grace to receive the Father’s love!